There is hardly anything more challenging and delightful than relationships. This is because relationships really touch us deeply. We open up and let another person look behind our walls and defense mechanisms, behind our masks and roles. Therefore, they are pleasing because we learn that we are not alone. However, where there is ego in our minds, where we have lack, previous suffering, old feelings of guilt and reproach, they are at best challenging – at worst hell.
Relationships are really sacred. Sacred means that something has a divine connection and therefore deserves special appreciation. And by “divine” I mean God in the sense of perfection. God is perfect goodness, perfect love, perfect peace, blessing, creation. He created all good. Where there is no good, there is distance from God – like darkness “remains” at a distance from the light source. The more our minds are healed, the more joyful and happier our relationships are. What can help if ego shows up in one of our relationships or if the “shit hits the fan”? The following seven steps can be helpful:
1. Know that this is not the truth because it is not LOVE. Whatever happens, however terrible it feels, it’s not the truth.
2. Ask for a miracle. You are entitled to miracles, i.e. for a solution to this situation. The solution is in your mind exactly where the problem is. It is already waiting for you to accept it or make use of it. Focus on the solution and trust.
3. Don’t judge. I know: it’s easier said than done. But if you judge you block the solution and the miracle! Whenever you notice that you want to judge, want to attack or attack yourself or someone else in your thoughts or actually, take yourself back. Remember that you can experience a miracle instead. You cannot have BOTH (judgment and miracles). Only one thing: your judgment or the miracle.
4. Relax, take a break. Do nothing further or at least try to think of something else.
5. Expect the miracle. Look out for it. Be thankful that it is already on its way.
6. Ask yourself: What can I learn from this? There is a lesson in the Course that says that everything is a lesson that we should learn. So what lesson is there for you to learn? Maybe there is someone from your past with whom something similar has happened before and whom you have not yet forgiven. Know that God’s spirit is in your spirit and can use this situation to heal and free you. Ask to be instructed and pay attention to the information that is coming to you. This information could come from friends, from the radio, from a book, from a dream, or it could just suddenly appear as knowledge or words in your mind.
7. Practice gratitude. Focus on the things in life that you can be thankful for. This further opens your mind to miracles and brings peace back.
These are simple and powerful steps that will make your relationships a spiritual path and a source of miracles for you!